Friday, April 07, 2006

It's All Good!

It’s been nearly a month now, and I became suddenly scared. This is the time when I typically get dumped. The guys in my past have been so mean about it too. One day everything seems fine and great and I’m buying lingerie, the next day it’s over with no reasonable explanation. Sometimes not even a phone call. So I was scared. Dale is different than they were, I know that. A prolonged lack of sleep really messed with my head.

This week has been difficult; not sleeping enough coupled with the time change and Boom! Who am I and what did I do with Cheri? I am somewhat delusional and I know I am seeing rejection where exhaustion lives, boredom where needing sleep resides. I couldn’t help but wonder if he feels the same way?

But I took a nap yesterday. It was a well deserved, much needed and very welcomed nap, and it did wonders! I went to his house and reclaimed my butterflies. He looks deep into my eyes and my heart goes pitter patter. He’s still just as into me as he was, and I am so into him. No second guessing, no pushing, no clinging. This is a time for enjoyment.

Today I get to really enjoy! I get my first climbing lesson today after school. I am so excited! We’ll camp on his land tonight. It’s a great time to be alive! I’m so glad I didn’t give up too soon.

I love him, I love him, I love him! I’ll try hard not to watch the clock today. I know how the next five hours will go, how they will stretch into an intolerable infinity. Then the hours that follow will seem to be nothing more than a flash of lightening. In the end, I know that time is on my side. I have countless hours to wish for him, fleeting seconds to spend with him, but a lifetime to love him.


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