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Shoshone Falls April 29, 2006

Dale

Things with Dale just keep getting better and better. I don’t spend any time worrying about the future or whether he really likes/loves me. I don’t have to! He shows me every day how important I am to him. I get to go on a cruise to Hawaii with him and his family this summer! I have never done anything like that before. And the fact that his mother jumped through hoops to get me on the ship after already having made all the arrangements says a lot! She and I have not met yet, and the fact that she was willing to do this says a lot about how Dale feels about me.

He did tell me that everyone sees how happy he is now. Everyone sees how happy I am now too.


Lynn

I just wish everyone could be happy for me. It is one of those terribly sad facts of life that I surrounded myself with people who enjoyed my misery. What is sad is that I didn’t know who they were until I fixed the part of my life that they feel they are lacking.

Lynn has been married forever. Her husband makes a more than comfortable living for her. She has the best of everything and never has to worry about money. Without all of those things, she would have nothing. Her life is empty where she needs it to be full, where my life is filling up now, and it is cutting so deeply.

She has been quite depressed this year, I have seen it worsen. If I were half the person I hope to be someday, I would handle things with her much better. But she has been very discouraging when it comes to my newfound happiness, and has even said things that reminded me a lot of things my mother might say. The things that only got said when Cheri was getting too happy, and needed to be brought down a peg or two.

Summer break is coming, maybe a few months apart will help during this time of change for me.


Zach

My son is graduating at the end of this month. I am so excited for him. No one ever worked harder for anything. He has a stick-to-it-ness that is unrivaled. He has a long hard road ahead yet, but I have no doubt in his ability to make it. He is definitely liking my new happiness. He really likes Dale. They are spending some time together doing things guys do. Little things that dads are supposed to do with their sons, but Zach’s dad never had time for. I think Dale kind of likes the idea of getting to be dad-like right now.

I guess time will tell the tale. And when it does, I’ll write it here.