Thursday, June 28, 2007

Scrutator: Intentionality

So now I know my ultimate worth. I should have been a missing link like Lucy, then I would be worth so much people would fight over me. Oh well, I guess it's something.
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That is supposed to be funny, but it seems that I haven't even given myself that much value. That, however, is about to change!

The universe has colluded yet again to illustrate for me how my self concept and ideal self are indeed bifurcated. My dolorous disposition can only ameliorate with the acceptance of this abstruse verity. I have chosen to defeat the factious attitudes drowning me in stagnation. The jejune aspects of my personality will be replaced by an expanded persona that even I can venerate.

That’s right! I figured out why I continue to face depression. .I wrote that I isolate myself because I fear rejection. Perhaps the truth is I isolate myself because I am afraid to live my life. Rejection isn’t fun, but the only way it can hurt me is when it actually comes from me. What others think of me is not important. The only thing of importance is what I think of me. If there are aspects of myself that I am unhappy with, I have the power to change them. If I want to move forward and have a happy fulfilling life, I must take the initiative to do so. That is the task I have at hand. I must begin to live my life with intentionality.

It was James Thurber
US author, cartoonist, humorist, & satirist (1894 - 1961) who wrote
All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.
Such is my task

Friday, June 22, 2007

Scrutator: Discontent

Thoughts of my ether friend in Texas are abundant of late. I hope he finds himself successful in his quest to regain his health. His absence is deeply felt.

My struggle to uncover my own (mental) health has been fraught with angst. Even my dreams launch messages into the night:

“We come into this world completely unprepared for what we are about to experience. What meaning will you bring to your experience?” --My Dream Narrator (Cheri)

Ah! The booming voice of dreams imprints on the souls of us all. The turmoil I call my life requires meaning. I search in the dark. My languid attempts to countervail my psychic agon have found me wanting. Lacking a forum to engage in meaningful disquisition , I persist in cultivating not but inadequate rejoinders, and drift about eructing hostile invectives. The water is deep and dark. The seaweed clutches at my ankles. I gasp for breath.

But I persist in my quest for knowledge. As Mahatma Gandhi said: "Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it." On a good day, I might find something that eloquently describes and explains this journey. Sometimes nothing touches me. This week, the reactionary in me was touched. Yes, you should be scared! I am.

Will society ever get it? If women have to be subjected to seeing men walk around topless, and ladies, we all know how disgusting that can be at times, then women should have the right to do the same thing without being arrested. My personal opinion is that western society is far to obsessed with women's breasts. Men are also far to concerned about their penises. I would like to say that's thanks to Freud, but it's been going on for a really long time. India is just vibrating with its newest penis protector. Sounds good to me ;)

Another innocent boy ends up in the hospital after being tricked into drinking alcohol.

Could it be that autism is not caused by mercury after all? Researchers now know that a protein imbalance is likely to play a major roll. Robert F. Kennedy Jr. would disagree. He has this rant at Huffington Post. He is an example of why not to get too attached to a theory. I just hope the Omnibus trials come out on the side of reason.

I have anecdotal evidence of my own that disputes the anecdotal evidence being presented at this trial. When I got my MMR vaccination, I developed a dangerously high fever and was very ill for a time after. I don't have autism. I wasn't the best mother, however, because I was really bad at making sure my kids had their vaccinations. Zach never got his MMR vaccination. I was always afraid that the school police were going to call me on it, but they never did. He does have it up to date now, but he definitely had autism before he got the MMR vaccination.

It's been a very tough week for me. Even though there is no driving, this personalities class is still collecting dues. Just a couple more weeks and I can breathe.

Rated NC-17

My blog is not appropriate for people under 17! What's My Blog Rated? From Mingle2 - Online Dating

Mingle2 - Online Dating

I got this rating because I have written the words death (8x); hurt (6x); pain (4x); hell (3x); murder (2x); kill (1x). I'm not really writing for the younger crowd anyway.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results

A pattern seems to have emerged. Intellect, independence, introversion, perfectionist, with a touch of paranoia splashed on top.

Cattell's 16 Factor Test Results
Emotional Stability58%
Social Assertiveness74%
Take Cattell 16 Factor Test (similar to 16pf)
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Freudian Inventory Results

I was going to ask "what does Freud know?" but I guess he knows me - except the part about fidelity. One man at a time for me.

Freudian Inventory Results
Oral (36%) you appear to be stubbornly and irrationally against receiving help even when it might be the more intelligent option.
Anal (43%) you appear to have a good balance of self control and spontaneity, order and chaos, variety and selectivity.
Phallic (83%) you appear to have issues with controlling your sexual desires and possibly fidelity.
Latency (46%) you appear to have a good balance of abstract knowledge seeking and practicality, dealing with real world responsibilities while still cultivating your abstract and creative faculties and interests.
Genital (63%) you appear to have a progressive and openminded outlook on life unbeholden to regressive forces like traditional authority and convention.
Take Free Freudian Inventory Test
personality tests by

Maslow Inventory Results

Wow! I would be self actualized if I had a clue what love is supposed to be. Is that really all I'm missing here? All I need is love! bu bu budada All I need is love, love. Love is all I need. Love is all I need. Love is all I need ......

Maslow Inventory Results
Physiological Needs (37%) you appear to have everything you need to survive physically.
Safety Needs (40%) you appear to have an adequately secure environment.
Love Needs (70%) you appear to be unhappy with the quality of your social connections.
Esteem Needs (27%) you appear to have a high level of personal competence.
Self-Actualization (66%) you appear to have a high level of individual development.
Take Free Maslow Inventory Test
personality tests by

Jung Explorer Test

Jung Exploere Test This one is fairly stable. I have taken it before and I usually score pretty close to this on all of them.

Jung Explorer Test
Actualized type: INTP
(who you are)
Introverted (I) 53.85% Extroverted (E) 46.15% Intuitive (N) 55.56% Sensing (S) 44.44%Thinking (T) 63.33% Feeling (F) 36.67%Perceiving (P) 54.84% Judging (J) 45.16%
INTP - "Architect". Greatest precision in thought and language. Can readily discern contradictions and inconsistencies. The world exists primarily to be understood. 3.3% of total population.
Preferred type: INTP
(who you prefer to be)
Introverted (I) 59.26% Extroverted (E) 40.74%Intuitive (N) 52.94% Sensing (S) 47.06%Thinking (T) 53.57% Feeling (F) 46.43%Perceiving (P) 56.25% Judging (J) 43.75%
INTP - "Architect". Greatest precision in thought and language. Can readily discern contradictions and inconsistencies. The world exists primarily to be understood. 3.3% of total population.
Attraction type: ENFP
(who you are attracted to)

Extroverted (E) 54.05% Introverted (I) 45.95%Intuitive (N) 56.41% Sensing (S) 43.59%Feeling (F) 51.22% Thinking (T) 48.78%Perceiving (P) 75% Judging (J) 25%

ENFP - "Journalist". Uncanny sense of the motivations of others. Life is an exciting drama. 8.1% of total population.

Take Jung Explorer Test
personality tests by

Enneagram Test Results

Enneagram Test results show that I am detached, calm, perfectionist. Everything else was under 50%. I prefer my own little world to the real one out there, like to make sense of things, am perceptive and inventive. I am also withdrawn, compliant and not assertive. Well, I might be more assertive than the test thinks. This one almost nailed me.

Enneagram Test Results
Type 1 Perfectionism56%
Type 2Helpfulness28%
Type 3Image Focus35%
Type 4Hypersensitivity38%
Type 5Detachment69%
Type 6Anxiety49%
Type 7Adventurousness51%
Type 8Aggressiveness45%
Type 9Calmness68%
Your main type is 5
Your variant is self pres
Take Free Enneagram Personality Test

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

According to the Advanced Global Personality Test, I am intellectual, artistic and like physical security. I like my individuality, indie (experimental, cynical, anti-corporation, more likely to be averse to organized religion, environmental, solitary at times, nihilistic, anti-materialism, likes obscure books / movies / music, unconventional, eccentric, curious, non-traditional, internally driven - if that didn't hit the nail on the head), etc etc

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test results

My theories of personality paper requires me to assess my personality and guess what Adler and Rogers would say about me. I have done a lot of work on who I am, but I thought I would take some of these tests to see if I am what I think I am. Maybe I can get someone who knows me well to fill one out for me too.

Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results
Group Attachment22%
Impulse Control74%
Emotional Stability50%
Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test
personality tests by
Factorlow scorehigh score
Gregariousness38%quiet, reclusiveengaging, socially bold
Sociability58%withdrawn, hiddenwarm, open, inviting
Assertiveness58%timid, gunshycontrolling, aggressive
Poise54%uneasy around otherssocially comfortable
Leadership46%stays in backgroundprefers to lead
Provocativeness30%modest, plays it safebold, uninhibited, cocky
Self-Disclosure46%private, containedvery open and revealing
Talkativeness26%quiet, stealthy, invisiblemotor mouth, loud
Group Attachment22%loves solitudeprefers to be with others
Understanding82%insensitive, schizoidrespectful, sympathetic
Warmth78%disinterested in otherssupportive, helpful
Morality86%break/ignore the rulesplay by the rules
Pleasantness50%aloof or disagreeablegets along with others
Empathy86%out of tune w/ othersin tune with others
Cooperation90%competitive, warlikeagreeable, peaceful
Sympathy50%socially inconsideratesocially conscious
Tenderness42%cold hearted, selfishwarm hearted, selfless
Nurturance30%self pleasing, me firstpeople pleasing, me last
Conscientiousness74%reckless, unscheduled careful, planner
Efficiency58%unreliable, lazyfinisher, follows through
Dutifulness70%leisurely, derelictstrict, rule abiding
Purposefulness58%inattentive, undisciplinedprepared, focused
Organization74%relaxed, obliviousdetail oriented, anal
Cautiousness42%impulsive, spendthriftrestrained, cautious
Rationality74%irrational, randomdirect, logical
Perfectionism62%careless, error pronedetail obsessed
Planning42%disorganized, randomscheduled, clean
Stability42%easily frustratedcalm, cool, unphased
Happiness34%unhappy, dissatisfiedself content, positive
Calmness62%touchy, volatileeven tempered, tolerant
Moderation46%needs instant gratificationeasily delays gratification
Toughness66%hypersensitive, moodythick skinned
Impulse Control74%lacks self controlmaintains composure
Imperturbability38%highly emotionalemotionally contained
Cool-headedness66%demanding, controllingaccommodating
Tranquility26%emotionally volatileemotionally neutral
Intellect82%instinctive, non-analyticalintellectual, analytical
Ingenuity90%lacks new ideasinnovative, novel
Reflection90%unreflective, coarseart and beauty lover
Competence90%slow to understand/thinkintellectual, brainy
Quickness90%intellectually dependentintellectually independent
Introspection82%not self reflectiveself searching
Creativity90%dull headedsynthesizer, iconoclast
Imagination78%practical, realisticdreamer, unrealistic
Depth90%lacks curiositymental explorer

Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Test
personality tests by

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

It's Wednesday

I don't miss driving. Class is ok. Test scores suck. I'm having a hard time learning. Doing the work is a drag. The book is dry. I have a theory of my personality. I'll post it someday. I'm not sleeping well. TD weighs heavy on my mind. It's hot. I want to play. I miss Mt. Hood. Pirates of the Caribbean was awesome! Critics don't know. It's almost dinner time. I should barbeque. Bye now.

Tuesday, June 19, 2007


I'm going to visit the land where LOR was filmed.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Scrutator: On Vultures and Allies

Months of clambering to proselytize my son to contravene the leitmotif of his association with a certain “friend”, and fulminating at my failures, have finally taken me to a place where I might find quiescence of soul at last. It came with great difficulty, and new ways of seeing things is the result.

ABA can be a good thing, when it is done by intelligent therapists. But usually they are just kids with bachelor’s degrees who didn’t have the motivation to finish their education, or were unable to find more secure employment elsewhere. The end result can be quite frightening. Teaching any child to comply without question can only lead to heartbreak. An adult who only knows that he should comply makes great game for manipulative vultures who use intimidation to gain compliance. Don’t think, just do. I didn't know this would be the result back then, but I sure know it now. It is as the great Danish philosopher, Soren Kierkegaard once said "Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards." This is what I have come to understand:

One of the most profound human elements I have been trying to come to terms with is autism advocacy. Over the past six months, I have been desperately trying to teach my son how to advocate for himself against someone who is far more socially competent than he is. I have failed - terribly. Over at the autism hub, there is currently a battle of wills taking place. Larry and Kev are currently battling with each other, and it seems everyone wants to put in their two cents. Larry thinks that non-autistic people have no right to advocate for NDs. Kev is a father who is trying to help pave roads for his son so that his son won't have such a hard time when he grows up.

Larry doesn't understand that advocating for anything requires a very good command of social skills and political maneuvering. I look at my son and wonder if he will ever have a good enough grasp of what motivates people to protect himself from the vultures and accept help from allies. I wonder if he will ever know the difference. I wonder if he is really any different from any other autistic individual when it comes to making themselves heard. As long as I have breath in my lungs, I will fight for the rights and dignity of people who struggle to be heard and valued in this superficial world.

Doc at Autism Street posted this video about how neurotypicals can help autistic individuals. I like what it has to say. This really is all we want for our children. One can replace autism with any word that is used to isolate groups of people. It's about accepting the diversity that makes the human race so successful.

I had to mute my computer to get the message because the song they play happens to have an incredibly intense effect on my emotions. I haven't been able to figure out exactly what my soul thinks it means, but it often moves me to tears. And I don't even know the words.

Joel says something in this post that I have been trying to tell people for a long time. Political incorrectness isn't about people being too sensitive, it is about people being too insensitive. A person says a lot about him/herself when the only way they know to build him/herself up is to tear other people down. It doesn't stop the damage, because the words one person uses in earnest today, becomes the "catch" word of society in general. Retard and retarded are the current words of choice. No one seems to care that every time they use those words, they are denying an entire population of people their dignity. And they do it without ever even trying to get to know someone who actually has a mental disability.

It is nice to have a little lighter fare to share this week. One needs some relief from life from time to time, and this is what I found this week to lighten things up a bit.

I feel the earth - move - under my feet Apparently, I traveled significantly farther than just 230 miles a day to get to and from school. In fact, I traveled 2,644,200,000 each day I went to Poky. Your supposed to calculate how far the earth moves while makin' it with your sweety, but I don't have one. We are really hauling ass folks.

Nevada has a new power plant that is intended to be environmentally friendly. Would it be a better idea to have these solar panels installed on all of the roofs of the residents who will be using the power? 400 acres have been sacrificed for power. Is it environmentally sound to displace wildlife when we have so much city space and so many roadways that could be used to build solar plants on and along side of?
This is what I'm talking about! Put these solar shingles on every house in the world! It is so much more sensible than taking up hundreds of acres of land to make power. Think of all the roofs out there that are nothing but wasted potential! Now, even Al Gore's roof is solar! He had to fight to get them, but it was worth it!

What happens when we run out of oil? Make it out of dead people! I remember seeing a bad b movie when I was a small child that was filmed at the Craters of the Moon Ntl. Monument here in Southern Idaho. It was about time traveling, and apparently, traveling into the future was bad, because if they were found by the people in the future,they would be used as fuel in cars. The little girl wondered what they would do if they ever ran out of those time travelers! She was about my age. It was a really long time ago.

I was quite surprised when I learned that Jericho had been cancelled. I thought it was a good show with believable characters and story lines. It had just enough suspense to keep me watching. Its time slot sucked, so I often watched it online. I guess a lot of people did, and when CBS cancelled it, people became so squeaky that CBS listened. They're bringing it back! But now they are telling viewers they need to try to watch the actual broadcast. I imagine they will move the show to another time slot. I wonder if they will work around my schedule.

Cucumber Pepsi Anyone?
I wonder if it's worth drinking? If it isn't too sugary it might be pretty good!

Plants are social beings! I always thought my weeping willow trees were whispering secrets about me to each other. Now, I know they are! Ok, so that's a stretch, but really, it could happen! Maybe.

And who knows what distances they will travel to to spread the word!?!

And just like that (yeah, like it was easy) I am finally caught up with my blog reading. Whew! My head is swimming. In an ocean of words. Hmm. Ocean. What do you find in an ocean? Ships. What is on a ship? Pirates! That's right, I am finally going to go see Pirates of the Caribbean! Finally! I don't care if everyone says it's dull. I don't care if it didn't make as much money as spidey. I'm going to go see Pirates. Because Johnny Depp is it! Besides, I need a break. I need a laugh. I need some buttery popcorn.

I don't know how pirates say goodbye. But whatever it is, I'm saying it.

p.s. I thought it would be fun to play with words. I have taken the word of the day words and tried to write them all into one or two paragraphs (starting with the last scrutator post) and hoping to come up with a paragraph that actually makes sense. It is really a stretch to say they actually make sense, but it's kind of fun to try. So don't judge me too harshly on my opening paragraphs. I would think that the more I do it, the better I will get. I guess time will tell.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Premature E-Jaculation

Moments after I posted my last blog entry, I got a call from the officer who pulled over TD and sent Zach to the hospital. He came by with complaint forms and found something to charge TD with.

Assault and Battery: 18-913. FELONIOUS ADMINISTERING OF DRUGS DEFINED. Any person who administers, aids in administering or orders the administering to another any chloroform, ether, laudanum or other narcotic, anaesthetic or intoxicating agent, with intent to enable or assist himself or any other person to commit a felony, is guilty of felonious administering of drugs.

So, we are going to be able to get the no contact order after all. And just in time too! Zach gets paid again on the 20th, and TD knows it.

Zach had to write down everything he remembers about that night. TD had a big bottle of vodka, and manipulated Zach into taking a swig of it. Then he gave Zach a glass of grapefruit juice to chase it down. Zach ended up drinking 5 glasses of grapefruit juice. At some point, before he passed out, they laughed at him and told him they had put vodka in the grapefruit juice.

All I really need is just to get TD to stay away from Zach. Deep down inside, however, I want the little SOCH to rot in hell jail for the rest of his life. Ok, hell too, but for the rest of his existence. Too bad I don't believe there is a hell. Maybe I can make an exception for TD, the little SOCH.

The Good, the Bad, and the Frustrated!

The police department has chosen not to press charges against TD and his crack whore mother. "The boys were all over the age of 18" after all. What part of "they took advantage of his autism" do they not get? Zach is actually suffering PTSD because of what happened.

Apparently, Zach did willingly take a drink of Vodka, but he didn't know they had spiked his grapefruit juice with it. The last thing he remembers, before waking up with tubes in his arms, is sitting around the kitchen table at TDs talking.

Why did they have his wallet and cell phone? No answers from them. As a matter of fact TD refuses to talk to me. When I went over to get Zach's stuff, he played passed out on the couch. His mother offered to let me wake him up. Can you believe that? I restrained myself, I would have just beaten the little MF do death if I hadn't. A Couple of days ago I again went over to get his stuff. JV and JB were both there, and JV was whistling at TD to answer the door. Of course, TD wouldn't come to the door because he is a spineless son of a crack whore! JB gave me his wallet, but first he had to put his debit card back in it. They didn't get his PIN from him, because he only knows it by finger movements, therefore, they got no money from the kid they almost killed.

I bought Zach a new cell phone, and he likes it better than the one he lost at the S.O.C.H.'s house. He is definitely staying away from the TD gang, and so far, they have stayed away from Zach. That's good, too, because they don't want to make things worse now.
Big talk from such a frustrated powerless old woman, isn't it? They say there is no fury like a woman scorned. There are a lot of things I would like to do in retaliation, but alas, so far I'm all talk. That's the shadow in me the Jung talked of.

Zach is going to start going to church with Megan so he can make some new friends, and that's good. Lots of funky things get said about mormons, but all the ones I have known are good people. I trust my kids to be safe there.

But those boys really better keep there distance. I will do whatever it takes to keep my children safe.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

A Night in the ER

Well, I’m not in a better mood. I spent the night in the hospital with my son. A “friend” of his since third grade got cut off from the money last month. Zach refused to overdraw his account to give him more money, so the boy started harassing Zach, Megan and me. Zach was ready to cut things off, and against the pit in my stomach, I agreed that he could go tell this boy that it was time to break ties.

So the group of boys that were there decided to get Zach drunk. I’m sure what they though is that if Zach got drunk enough he would divulge his PIN. What they did is get Zach to drink enough vodka fast enough that he passed out. They were in the boy’s mother’s car (she bought the vodka for them) when a police officer pulled them over because the taillights were out in the car. That was when he saw Zach in the back of the car passed out and throwing up. He then called an ambulance. I wonder if he hadn’t pulled them over what they would have done. Would they have taken him to the hospital? I have a feeling the little cowards were planning to dump him somewhere. Of course, they got his wallet.

His blood alcohol level was .28 something. They told me that .4 is death. Tomorrow I’m taking Zach to the police station to get a protection order. He finally sees that this boy isn’t actually his friend, and that he is actually in danger when with him. I hope that lasts.

Because of his autism, he has a hard time making and keeping friends. This boy was always calling and coming around, and the fact that Zach had money was probably why. He managed to steal at least $400 from him in the past six months. None of it was provable, which irked me to no end. Even though I was constantly trying to explain to Zach that the boy was the only person who could and would have done it, Zach was so resistant to believing it. He needed a friend. Maybe on some level, he thought it was worth the loss of the money.

The war isn’t over, but this battle is won. I am going to work every possible angle to make sure this break is permanent. Zach is tired of not having any money, even though he has a job and works hard. He is disillusioned with the boy for lying to the police (he said he found Zach wandering around drunk like that and was taking him to the hospital).

I do know I won’t be complaining about boring Saturday nights at home alone for a while. I also know Zach won’t be drinking again for a while. Hang-overs suck. I keep having really dark thoughts about things I can do that would put that boy in prison. He makes it so easy. Too easy. I’m not the kind of person to hound someone to make sure they go to jail, but I’m protecting my kid here. My mommy hairs are standing on end, my teeth are bared, and my claws are sharpened. I won’t be losing this war.

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Scrutator: Almost Agreeable

Concluding an arduous epoch of study appears to have palliated my disagreeable disposition. Nevertheless, an incipient notion threatens to intrude upon my diminutive sabbatical. Though the trek will not exist, a new course of study must be completed by a quarter past the next full moon. I shall endeavor not to perfunctorily engage in this charge, but to assume the challenge with zeal. I shall execute this assignment with an epicene philosophy that will bear me through to completion. Though in whole, this makes little sense, in part it is pure brilliance. I just don’t know which part.

The week has been spent in study such that little time was left for true self reflection. I managed to hold on to a few interesting tidbits that I might share.

We all want toys. I'd like to have one of those new apple phone things. They look cool. As an artist who is stuck in Idaho, I found something even better! I want this! I want it so bad I can't even tell you. It is too cool! Imagine all of the possible applications of this. It just blows my mind.

Has anyone out there had a chance to go see the creation museum? I haven't. I'm not sure I will ever make an effort to go see it. Perhaps I just wasn't that intelligently designed.

But then who among us is that intelligently designed. Our children are being imprisoned - by us. And not for just having a senior prank food fight. When the police do go after people, they should be careful not to hurt themselves by tripping. They should also not raid the wrong place and kick innocent men in the groin. Police are looking for a naked peeping tom. Maybe they should ask this officer what he knows about it.

They know how the iceman died. He was murdered. Do you supposed the discovery channel with host CSI: National Geographic?

Yes, my disposition has improved! Imagine how bad it must have been!

My next post will be happier.

Tuesday, June 05, 2007


I'm going to listen to the walls of this long deserted city, and learn the secrets they have to share.

Monday, June 04, 2007


Ok, so I'm cranky. Only three days left, then the driving is done, the six hours a day sitting in classes is done, and hopefully, my bad attitude will be done. Megan and Zach are the only people left in my life who don't hate me. You can't be Megan's enemy, it's just not possible. But the fact that Zach and I are still getting along is amazing. Usually, when one of us is in a cranky way, we fight and argue constantly. Maybe if I were here more, we would be fighting.

I'm so irritated with the world that my irritation is really starting to irritate me.

I wonder, from time to time, especially when things get tough, if what I'm doing is the right thing. Luckily for me, I know better than to make decisions based on emotion alone. I'm just exhausted, that's all. I'll be better soon.

I need a vacation.
I'll settle for a little rest!

Maybe not that much rest.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Scrutator: A Little Acceptance

How can I truly document how I come to my strange spiritual decisions without charting the paths I took? In the true scientific spirit, I am going to start publishing some of the things I find on the internet, in class, or life in general, that cause me to question what I think, and why I think it. If anyone reads it and finds it interesting, they can replicate and retain or reject my claims.

First of all, driving on the freeway 14-16 hours a week really shines a light on my own frailties. That's right, I'm just a hot headed so and so. What good does it do me to become infuriated at a person driving 65.2 mph passing a person driving 65.1 mph for 10 minutes while I ride too closely behind? I'm sure they won't be experiencing heart failure before I do.

I found this cool picture at Space It made me think about all the nights we got clouded out while I was still involved with the Magic Valley Astronomical Society. Often times when we get it in our heads that we want to do a certain thing, life intervenes. We want to see the stars, but instead we get lightening. We cannot control the weather any more than I can control how others drive. We might as well enjoy what is tossed in our paths.

Even if we could change the weather, should we?
Janet D. Stemwedel (whose nom de blog is Dr. Free-Ride) thinks we should. But I would agree more with NASA administrator Michael Griffin who testified before a House committee in March. I do believe humans are effecting global warming, but I'm not convinced it will cause all of the doom and gloom that climatologists predict. I think it's a good idea to rein in the human causes, but the planet should have its way. Besides, even climatologists don't have everything right yet. They are constantly working and reworking the models, and until they can show that they have all their little crystal balls in a row, they should not claim that we currently have the best climate earth has to offer, and propose we should do everything in our power to keep it that way. They can't know that a warmer climate is worse than the climate at the end of an ice age. If we significantly reduce the human cause, and the global temperature continues to rise, we should accept it and learn to adapt. That is what natural selection would have us do, isn't it?

Apparently, we aren't too good at fooling mother natural selection. The save the pandas project has had a
set back. They'll keep trying. Scientists are so set on making sure that the next generation of children experience the world we know today that they don't stop to think that maybe tomorrow's children have their own world to experience.

We have another actor who may have a shot at running the "free world". Actors are successful in office because they know how to pretend to be something/someone they are not. This one started campaigning as a character in Law and Order! So people already think they know what kind of a person he is. A smart tough legal expert who has superb leadership abilities. Do you think people won't see his character more than they see the man who portrayed that character?

People are easy to fool, especially when they are desperate. (America is in a state of political desperation, is it not?) These parents were desperate to find someone to blame for their child's autism. After all, their lives are "utterly destroyed", a "fate worse than death" has befallen their child. Unable to accept that they have a child with nothing more than a (genetic?) disability, they are blaming the vaccine companies.
Their lawsuit is being heard this week. Maybe reason will come out ahead in this one.

Not that reason reigns in this world.
A police officer shot his daughter. She was sneaking back in. He though she was an intruder. Someone should relieve him of his gun!

It's not all bad. A new poll shows that fewer people believe in the literal interpretation of the bible. Maybe tomorrow's children will not be so easily fooled by crystal balls, and those who would fool mother natural selection, as long as they don't get shot to death sneaking back into their houses!

A little acceptance goes a long way, within reason.