Friday, June 22, 2007

Scrutator: Discontent

Thoughts of my ether friend in Texas are abundant of late. I hope he finds himself successful in his quest to regain his health. His absence is deeply felt.

My struggle to uncover my own (mental) health has been fraught with angst. Even my dreams launch messages into the night:

“We come into this world completely unprepared for what we are about to experience. What meaning will you bring to your experience?” --My Dream Narrator (Cheri)

Ah! The booming voice of dreams imprints on the souls of us all. The turmoil I call my life requires meaning. I search in the dark. My languid attempts to countervail my psychic agon have found me wanting. Lacking a forum to engage in meaningful disquisition , I persist in cultivating not but inadequate rejoinders, and drift about eructing hostile invectives. The water is deep and dark. The seaweed clutches at my ankles. I gasp for breath.

But I persist in my quest for knowledge. As Mahatma Gandhi said: "Whatever you do will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it." On a good day, I might find something that eloquently describes and explains this journey. Sometimes nothing touches me. This week, the reactionary in me was touched. Yes, you should be scared! I am.

Will society ever get it? If women have to be subjected to seeing men walk around topless, and ladies, we all know how disgusting that can be at times, then women should have the right to do the same thing without being arrested. My personal opinion is that western society is far to obsessed with women's breasts. Men are also far to concerned about their penises. I would like to say that's thanks to Freud, but it's been going on for a really long time. India is just vibrating with its newest penis protector. Sounds good to me ;)

Another innocent boy ends up in the hospital after being tricked into drinking alcohol.

Could it be that autism is not caused by mercury after all? Researchers now know that a protein imbalance is likely to play a major roll. Robert F. Kennedy Jr. would disagree. He has this rant at Huffington Post. He is an example of why not to get too attached to a theory. I just hope the Omnibus trials come out on the side of reason.

I have anecdotal evidence of my own that disputes the anecdotal evidence being presented at this trial. When I got my MMR vaccination, I developed a dangerously high fever and was very ill for a time after. I don't have autism. I wasn't the best mother, however, because I was really bad at making sure my kids had their vaccinations. Zach never got his MMR vaccination. I was always afraid that the school police were going to call me on it, but they never did. He does have it up to date now, but he definitely had autism before he got the MMR vaccination.

It's been a very tough week for me. Even though there is no driving, this personalities class is still collecting dues. Just a couple more weeks and I can breathe.


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